why wear pants when you can just not wear pants

(Source: grapfruit)

brokenheir:

hazythreshecutioner:

THANKS. 

> Laugh at how excited he is.

> Wriggle up and kiss his cheek.

> Smile and kiss his nose.

brokenheir:

hazythreshecutioner:

> Kiss his head.

YOU DON’T LEAVE ME EITHER, OKAY?

ai’l trai nawt to!

> Squeal happily.

THANKS. 

> Laugh at how excited he is.

brokenheir:

hazythreshecutioner:

> Hold and pet him, nuzzling softly into his hair.

I WON’T.

==> Sniffle and curl up on him.

gud.

> Kiss his head.

YOU DON’T LEAVE ME EITHER, OKAY?

brokenheir:

hazythreshecutioner:

YEAH, AT LEAST THAT’S HOW IT SEEMS TO ME.

==> Whimpers and clings to.

dohn’t leyve me to!

> Hold and pet him, nuzzling softly into his hair.

I WON’T.

brokenheir:

I’M NOT SURE, BUT IF I HAD TO GUESS, I’D SAY HE’S STUCK IN THE SAME PLACE AS DAVE.

stuhk? nawt kuming bak?!

YEAH, AT LEAST THAT’S HOW IT SEEMS TO ME.

torchinggoddess:

hazythreshecutioner:

torchinggoddess:

theres really only one person i-i can ask for help

AND I’M GOING TO GO OUT ON A STEEL REINFORCED LIMB HERE AND GUESS THEY’RE NOT AVAILABLE RIGHT NOW?

pretty much

THAT’S TOO BAD.
YOU HAVE MY SYMPATHY FOR THAT, EVEN THOUGH I’VE NEVER BEEN IN YOUR POSITION. 

torchinggoddess:

theres really only one person i-i can ask for help

AND I’M GOING TO GO OUT ON A STEEL REINFORCED LIMB HERE AND GUESS THEY’RE NOT AVAILABLE RIGHT NOW?

torchinggoddess:

hazythreshecutioner replied to your post: bard-0f-r4ge replied to your post: nnnng SeXy …

I THINK THESE PEOPLE JUST LIKE TORMENTING YOU AND WATCHING YOUR DISCOMFORT.

y-ya think

YEAH, OKAY, THAT WAS A CAPTAIN OBVIOUS STATEMENT THERE, BUT I JUST GOT UP AND I HAVEN’T EATEN YET.
SEEMS PRETTY RUDE TO ME, THOUGH. 
HAS ANYONE ACTUALLY OFFERED TO HELP YET?
THAT’S THE THING TO DO. 

bl1ndobstruct1on:

hazythreshecutioner:

bl1ndobstruct1on started following you

WELL WELL WELL, WHAT DO WE HAVE HERE?

H3H3H3H3

4R3N’T YOU H4PPY TO S33 M3, K4RKL3S >:]

I DON’T KNOW YOU, SO HOW COULD I BE HAPPY TO SEE YOU?
IN ALL FAIRNESS, I’M RARELY HAPPY TO SEE ANYONE, EVEN IF I DO KNOW THEM, THOUGH, SO TRY NOT TO TAKE IT PERSONALLY. 

ionesther asked - "are you kidding me? poison blood... that's a laugh! XD my blood is in the indigo spectrum :D pft poison? haha not!"

IF YOU SAY SO. I DON’T TAKE JUST ANYONE’S WORD FOR THINGS.
YOU DON’T SMELL TOO BAD, THOUGH, WHICH IS A PLUS.
IF YOU SMELLED LIKE CANDY OR SOME SHIT, I’D BE WORRIED.
WHY DO YOU FANCY BEING MY DINNER SO MUCH ANYWAY? 

Anonymous asked - "have at it i really don't care :) *paps your head* it's not like i can die anyways... ^^'"

*glare*
MAYBE, MAYBE NOT, BUT I’M SURE IT WOULDN’T BE VERY PLEASANT FOR YOU.
ON THE OTHER HAND, FOR ALL I KNOW, YOU HAVE POISON BLOOD.

Anonymous asked - "I'd rather not you are just to adorable :) *starts lightly rubbing the base of your horns*"

*swats at hands, making full use of his nails*
AND I’D RATHER YOU STOP FUCKING TOUCHING ME WITHOUT MY PERMISSION BEFORE I DECIDE GREY FACE BLOOD IS WHAT I’D LIKE FOR LUNCH.

Anonymous asked - "*hugs you and pets your head* cute little karkitty :) good boy XD lol"

*growls* WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS? STOP PATRONIZING ME.

brokenheir:

hazythreshecutioner:

ANONS DON’T EVEN TALK TO ME, LET ALONE GIVE ME THINGS.

ai hahven’t seeyn anee ekcept ga in long tyme.

IS THAT A GOOD THING OR A BAD THING FOR YOU?
WELL, OTHER THAN THE GUSHERS, OF COURSE.
I SUPPOSE IF YOU REALLY WANT THEM THAT BADLY WE COULD GO GET SOME, EVEN THOUGH I’M NOT TOO KEEN ON THEM.